Mine
by Azara-Rayne18
Summary: The New Directions boys can't believe that Blaine finds Kurt attractive. Blaine explains why he has the hottest boyfriend in existence. Klaine fluff, slash. I thought of this cute little one shot, and figured it would be a good break from all the angst.


Every so often, there comes a day in a man's life when he just feels like saying 'screw it'.

Blaine Anderson was having one of those days.

This dark frame of mind was a product of many things. Blaine was trying to adjust to a new school, after all, a school much less adoring and hospitable than the one he was used to. His shoulder still hurt from Azimio locker checking him in the hall today. He had to come to the stupid New Directions sleepover with a bunch of boys that he barely knew, some of which he was fairly certain didn't like him. And worst of all, Kurt was out with Burt and Carole in Columbus for the evening. His parents had bought tickets for him to see Wicked live, and Blaine was happy for him, really he was, but the last thing he wanted was to go through this night alone.

He had spent most of the night sitting next to Mike Chang, who was nice, quiet, and oddly protective ever since Mike learned that Blaine's mother was Asian. The boys had already consumed all of the soda and chips laid out for them, had a video game tournament which Artie won by a landslide, and were now sitting on the sleeping bags scattered throughout the Hudmel living room.

The other boys were discussing sexual conquests, and Blaine was distracting himself by staring at the pictures of his boyfriend dotting the wall. Baby Kurt was freakishly adorable. Especially when donning a tiny tuxedo and biting the head off of a Polly Pocket.

"I've got two words for you," Puck leaned forward, grasping his knees for leverage. "Lauren Zizes."

"No way, dude," Finn shook his head, "I can't believe she's as good as you say she is."

"I couldn't believe it either! But I'm telling you, bro, she's an animal in the sack," Puck said, "We were going make a sex tape this one time, until Miss Holliday told us we could wind up in prison. Too bad." Puck breathed a long sigh, his eyes bright with the ghost of what could have been.

"Still," Sam said, "I don't understand how you could dump a girl like Santana for her."

"I can."

"She's totally crazy."

"She wrote a song about you called 'Trouty Mouth'."

"Yeah," Sam shrugged, "But she's an awesome kisser. And she has the most amazing chest."

Puck snorted. "My new chick has four times the rack that Santana does. And she knows how to work it."

"Please, boys," Artie scoffed, "You all know my baby is the hottest thing to walk the halls of Mckinley high. Brittany has a scorching body, not to mention she used to be a cheerio. You know what that means, right? Total flexibility."

"Quinn used to be a cheerleader too, you know," Finn said. "And she's more than capable in bed."

"Wait, you've had sex with Quinn?" Sam asked. Finn nodded, and the corners of Sam's mouth dropped, his eyes wide and hurt.

"Well, none of your girls are a match for my Tina," Mike jumped into the fray, eager to defend his girlfriend. "I've made out with a few girls in my day, and none of them have been as eager as Tina. She's like a firecracker. And she loves my abs."

"Santana said I should probably drop some weight," Sam said, his hand self-consciously grazing his bare abdomen. "Do you guys think-"

At this, Blaine could no longer control himself. He tore his eyes away from the picture of eight year old Kurt hugging Mickey Mouse in front of Disneyland, and rolled onto his stomach. "Sam, you're perfect. Trust me."

The other boys fell silent, Finn taking on a mildly disgusted look that kind of pissed Blaine off, to be honest. But Sam's expression was all gratitude, "Really?"

"Absolutely. I'd kill for abs like yours. In fact, I can honestly say that you have the second hottest body I've ever seen," Blaine said. Sam grinned and snuggled deeper into his sleeping bag, obviously pleased.

"Wait, second hottest…" Puck froze, the idea taking a moment to sink in, "You're not serious."

"Eww," Finn groaned, "Come on, man, that's my brother. That's Kurt, I mean… he's not… Blaine, you're talking about somebody else, right?"

"No," Blaine said, "I'm talking about Kurt."

Finn's broken moan wasn't enough to cover Puck's laughter. "Kurt's the hottest guy you've ever seen? Kurt?"

Blaine sat up. "Is there something wrong with that?"

"No," Puck said, "Look, I think it's cool that you're gay and all, but I always kind of figured you went for Kurt because there was nobody else around. Kurt's my boy, but he's kind of skinny and… baby looking, you know?"

"Watch how you talk about him," Blaine said fiercely. "Oh, and he's not your boy. He's mine."

"Hey, there's no need to get testy." Finn was defending Puck. Of course. "We're not trying to say anything bad about Kurt. We just, don't really get why you think he's hot. Even for a guy, Kurt's always been… well, nothing special, that's all."

Blaine had opened his mouth to retort, but Artie beat him to it. "We've shared our girlfriend stories. How about you tell us something about Kurt?" Finn groaned, but the other boys seemed interested.

"Okay then," Blaine paused, considering. "Well, for one thing, he's gorgeous. He has this perfect hair, and his face is shaped so pretty… oh, and his eyes! He has the prettiest eyes I've ever seen. And he has the softest lips ever, and all this soft, pale skin. Sometimes, while we're kissing, he reaches up and cups my face and his hands are like silk, but they're so big and strong…"

"Yeah, yeah, we all know you like to kiss him," Puck interrupted, "But what is it about his body that gets you so intense, huh?"

Blaine raised his eyebrow. "Um, he was a cheerio too, you know. Kurt can kick his legs over his head. Both of his looooooong, loooooooooong legs. And he has big hands and feet. Almost as big as Finn's. You know what that means?"

The boys fell silent, processing this new information. Blaine was pretty sure Finn was about to hurt himself trying to work it out. "Oh!" Finn said, "You mean he has a big… oh… but why would you care unless…. Ewwwwww."

But Blaine couldn't stop himself, "Oh, and I've seen Kurt shirtless. He has abs. Perfect abs. He's toned without being too muscled. He has this little line of hair going down his stomach that is so unbelievably hot. And I don't even want to start on that ass."

"Ass?" Puck said.

"You need to watch him walk out of a room sometime. Kurt has the most amazing ass," Blaine sighed happily, "But the most important part is, I love him. Even if he didn't have super long legs and soft lips and a toned stomach and a perfect butt, I would still love him because he's Kurt. He's smart and witty and passionate and perfect. And he loves me for me, not for my abs or because I'll make him prom king. Kurt is more special than you could ever imagine. Now, I have a headache, and my shoulder hurts. Good night."

It was three in the morning before Kurt got home with his parents, his cheeks red from the night chill and his eyes bright with excitement. He crept into the living room, stepping over Puck and Sam's sleeping bags to get to the tuft of curly dark hair peeking out from a sleeping bag against the far wall.

"Hey," Kurt whispered, pressing a kiss to Blaine's cheeks. The boy stirred, eyes fluttering open, looking with sleepy confusion for what had woken him. He caught sight of Kurt, and smiled brightly.

"Hey. You want to come sleep over here with me?"

"I can't. Dad says I have to sleep in my room tonight. I just wanted to check on you. See you in the morning."

"Kurt," Blaine caught his boyfriend's attention before he could leave, "I love you."

Kurt's eyes glistened, and his lips broke into a wide smile. "I love you, too."

Kurt hummed quietly as he waltzed through the door, unaware that there were eyes following him out.

"Blaine's right," Puck said, staring at the doorway in apparent wonder, "Hummel does have a nice ass."

Blaine stirred and sat up briefly, leveling a sleepy yet challenging glare at the other boy.

"Mine."


End file.
